Wednesday Daybook

Outside:  is a state that can't make up its mind about autumn.  Are we there yet?  Because we all wore shorts and tees out to dinner and shopping last night...

Thinking: (again) about signing off of Facebook for a long "time-out" (my cousin used that term with me the other night for being away from Facebook and I'm stealing it) or until I can deal with its ugly side.  There's drama, none of which I (intentionally) create but some of which I can't help but be sucked into, and there's isolation, even in the midst of hundreds of "friends," because a lot of people don't bother to respond when you put something "out there."  And I don't get that.  Being on Facebook just to silently observe others is kinda...weird to me.  It's like being on the playground and sitting on a bench, watching the other kids play but not participating.  And if one of the kids falls off the monkey bars, not saying (or doing) anything.  Or if one of the kids finds joy in swinging super-high, not saying anything.  That is not to say that you have to "like" or comment on every last little thing, but you know, chiming in here or there is really the point, isn't it?  Otherwise, why have an account?  Perhaps I totally misunderstand the purpose of the social network but for right now, regardless, it's not working for me.

Thankful:  For royal-blue skies in October.  For finding new items of food that Will voluntarily eats, even if they're just cinnamon-graham crackers in the shape of cars.  For Lucy's growing confidence in taking several steps at a time.  For my husband, who can tell my mood and what kind of morning I've had by merely glancing at my face.  For this video that I watched yesterday, then posted on Facebook, then emailed to friends, then watched again last night with Marty.  Be looking for a blog post on it, coming soon; it has profoundly affected me and my understanding of myself and life in general and I can't wait to discuss it here!

From the kitchen:  Chicken Caesar salad tonight, Sirloin tips over rice tomorrow.  Haven't shopped for or thought of meals beyond then...

Going:  back to storytime at the library tomorrow, despite previous visits with questionable success.  I'm having a hard time helping Will to sit still, stay out of the personal space of others, leave the teacher's visual aids alone, and pay attention to the book being read.  I always leave sweaty and disheveled, pushing a stroller and holding shoes that have been kicked off and trying to discipline Will to "STAY WITH MOMMY."  I feel like I'm the object of much staring as we make our grand exit and for all the effort I put forth, I'm not sure it's worth it?

Reading: Still Jane Eyre's Husband on my Kindle for the PC.  I'd read a review in which the reader said that Rochester was really "sexed up" in this book and now I see what she means.  Er, it's pretty hot and steamy, and not necessarily in good ways.  Truly a bit much.  But now I'm so enmeshed in the story I can't see myself putting it down.  Sadly, I'm just not enjoying it as much as I'd hoped.  However, Rochester hasn't met Jane yet so there may be a turning point...

Shopping: For a good deal on a twin set of mattresses.  Last night, we all went to Target and we filled a cart with items for Will's big boy bed -- holy cow, the cost!  We spent about $80 on a waterproof mattress pad, pillow, sheets, and toddler rail (okay, we threw in some red curtain panels, but they just *go* with his bedding!).  And that's BEFORE spending money on the actual bed.  Kids are expensive.  If you didn't know.

Hoping:  To get most of the rest of The Great MEGA-Clean of Autumn 2011 finished this weekend.  We simply have to -- the first set of company arrives next weekend!

Hearing:  Silence.  Nothing.  It's blessed naptime!

A favorite thing:  Fiber One 80-calorie cereal.  It actually tastes good and I need to cut back on some of my, er, intake.  Okay, yes, I need to go on a diet.  And exercise regimen.  I need some new cold-weather clothes and I'm just *NOT* going to buy them in my current size.  If I did so, I would feel hateful and bitter every time I went into my closet.  So, no.